![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
You know, a comment I read on ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
errorist's journal made a little too much sense to me...
Simple. It's because society, especially in the west, elevates the notion of "self-sacrifice" much higher than that of "self-care". It is still considered sinful to love yourself, in most ways, after all. You're supposed to give "110%" for your team, your job, your coworkers, your family - and when does that leave you time for yourself?
[...]
And then, to top it all off, we're made to feel guilty about not taking care of ourselves. But not because we're being bad to ourselves, but because we're _costing other people time and money and safety_!
(Emphasis mine, full post with replies here)
DeAnna just walked by the bedroom, saw me on the computer, and just gave an exasperated sigh. Why? Because she was watching our daughter because I felt the need to go out to cool myself down. And yet here I was, on the computer, and lord knows it's not important that I called off from work so that she could get a little more rest than usual, it's not important that it's practically our daughter's bedtime, and let's just not mention that she's been acting like she feels a little better... I can't make the choice to write an entry on livejournal because I'M SUPPOSED TO HAVE A REASON FOR HER TO WATCH OUR DAUGHTER. People keep getting upset when I say I need "me" time, when I say that I stay up till 6 AM because the middle of the night is really the only time I get to myself... The complaint I often get is that I take too much time for myself. Here's a little hint, world.
IF I HAVE TO SEE YOU, IF I HAVE TO HEAR YOUR VOICE, IF I AM DOING SOMETHING FOR YOUR SAKE, THAT TIME IS NOT MINE. IT IS YOURS BECAUSE YOU ARE DILUTING IT WITH YOUR PRESENCE.
This goes to everyone and everything. Friends and loved ones - particularly my daughter - are more allowed to have my time, but I still need some alone, you know? I feel like everyone in the world expects something of me, and if I blink for just one second because my eyes are dry, I'm in the wrong for being selfish.
errorist's journal made a little too much sense to me...Simple. It's because society, especially in the west, elevates the notion of "self-sacrifice" much higher than that of "self-care". It is still considered sinful to love yourself, in most ways, after all. You're supposed to give "110%" for your team, your job, your coworkers, your family - and when does that leave you time for yourself?
[...]
And then, to top it all off, we're made to feel guilty about not taking care of ourselves. But not because we're being bad to ourselves, but because we're _costing other people time and money and safety_!
(Emphasis mine, full post with replies here)
DeAnna just walked by the bedroom, saw me on the computer, and just gave an exasperated sigh. Why? Because she was watching our daughter because I felt the need to go out to cool myself down. And yet here I was, on the computer, and lord knows it's not important that I called off from work so that she could get a little more rest than usual, it's not important that it's practically our daughter's bedtime, and let's just not mention that she's been acting like she feels a little better... I can't make the choice to write an entry on livejournal because I'M SUPPOSED TO HAVE A REASON FOR HER TO WATCH OUR DAUGHTER. People keep getting upset when I say I need "me" time, when I say that I stay up till 6 AM because the middle of the night is really the only time I get to myself... The complaint I often get is that I take too much time for myself. Here's a little hint, world.
IF I HAVE TO SEE YOU, IF I HAVE TO HEAR YOUR VOICE, IF I AM DOING SOMETHING FOR YOUR SAKE, THAT TIME IS NOT MINE. IT IS YOURS BECAUSE YOU ARE DILUTING IT WITH YOUR PRESENCE.
This goes to everyone and everything. Friends and loved ones - particularly my daughter - are more allowed to have my time, but I still need some alone, you know? I feel like everyone in the world expects something of me, and if I blink for just one second because my eyes are dry, I'm in the wrong for being selfish.
